Tuesday, August 11, 2009

It's been a few hours so I've had some time to gather my thoughts and figure out which direction I want to go with this post. I hope that by the end of this, I will have caused you to think harder and longer about your actions and more importantly how they may or may not reflect God's love. NACA an organization that helps people modify and refinance their home loans held a four-day event here in Atlanta. I originally found out about it Sunday after church and signed up. However, I didn't have all the necessary paperwork with me and I also had my 2-year son with me. Since the process can take several hours, I decided to leave, complete the paperwork online and return today (Tuesday) without my little one. So Sunday night, I went online, completed all the forms, and registered for a home save event scheduled in two weeks. But since I was off today, I decided to catch MARTA(our transit system) downtown to attend this event instead. In hopes of getting my ARM set to a reasonable fixed rate. The mortgage company had recently agreed to fixed it at the current rate of 10.99% (of course, I declined this offer. But that's a story for another post) Sorry, I do get a bit distracted at times. So when I arrive downtown the line to attend the event and receive housing counseling is unreal. It's like probably a thousand people in line. Keep in mind it's about 10 a.m. and it's already around 85 degrees. So I'm like okay I sure hope I see someone I know. Well don't you know I see someone from my church and I'm like omgoodness, I'm so glad to see you. To which she promptly replied, Oh no, you need to go to the back of the line. God must have put His hand over my mouth because my reply was just a polite, "oh, okay."
Of course on the inside I was like WTF(what the freak)...did I just see someone from Church, i.e. a fellow Christian and she said no.

Now please let me explain why I'm more saddened that angered at her actions. First, I am pretty sure that she knows I'm a single mother (since she's seen and spoken to me and my son at church numerous times.) Secondly, this wasn't a line for concert tickets but for people trying to save their homes. (Now, while my house isn't on the brink of foreclosure...she doesn't know that.) Thirdly, where's the Christian love? I know that it's wrong to cut in line BUT!!!!!!!! Honestly, I really can't imagine that if I saw Jesus in line, He would have told me to go to the back. I am saddened because:
what if my house was in foreclosure?
what if as a single mom, i had a limited amount of time and had to pick up my son?
what if i was feeling like crap and this was my last hope?
i could of course go on and on with the what ifs but i won't. Instead I will challenge all of us to pay it forward. We are here to be a blessing to each other. I feel blessed that I signed up online and will be attending the other event but I do hope that we remember we are not judges. Just think if the mortgage lenders had the same attitude as my fellow churchgoer, the event wouldn't even be happening. Instead the general consensus would be that you shouldn't need or expect someone to help you and that you should just deal with it. In closing, I have to ask, am I wrong for feeling some kinda way? If Jesus had been waiting in line for hours and saw someone from His church (who could potentially be losing their house), do you think He would have let me cut the line? I'm excited to see what other people think.
(p.s. i have no idea if the person i'm referring to reads my blog, but if so, i sincerely don't have any hard feelings against her. instead, this experience has helped me be more committed to sharing and showing God's love to others.)


Felicia - I complete Me said...

Very interesting post, and very thought provoking. I don't think you a wrong for your feelings. I will never tell anyone their feelings are wrong. But just like you have what if's that she doesn't know about you, you have what if's that you don't know about her (did I type that right?). Should she let every person she see that is a fellow churchgoer in front her? If I was standing on that line I have to ask myself the same question would I let someone in front of me as it took me forever (in my own eyes of course) to get to the point to where I am. I don't know, I probably would do the same thing as my church is quite huge (just being funny).

Anyway, I like to believe I help as much as I can but we don't always no the circumstances of someone else, and if we constantly put the what if's before our own individual needs where does that leave us (or her)?

joanofalltrades said...

Interesting comment by my girl Felicia. Her Date Night show is on Blog Talk Radio tonight at 11pm--btw. Okay back to your post. I also like to play devil's advocate. Wait, that just sounded weird. As a christian, should I even be playing devil's advocate? Just sounds unGodly. Anyway, I'm rambling because I just don't know on this one. I would have definitely let you in line, but I think we have a closer relationship. I still think she could have at least given an explanation because it seems like she was kind of rude.

pecanglo said...

I too am saddened by this because I know your circumstances. But you know what? If we all had to wait until we knew each person's situation or were intimately close friends, then there wouldn't be much Christian love shown anywhere. For me, I would have felt if a person came to me in that situation, I would like to feel, what if it were reversed and it was me rushing to get there and finding myself in a very long line, wouldn't I be thanking God that I see someone I know! It wouldn't have to take a rocket scientist to figure out that I would be bee-lining to that person and even feel a little embarrassed but I would still feel, let me ask. I would be undoubtedly forever grateful that they could look past the fact that I hadn't gotten there earlier or that I had to muster up the courage to see if I could be with her in the line. It just isn't that hard or complicated if we are really trying at least to remember that we are family. In God's eyes, in God's church, we help one another. None of this judgmental stuff. Just let you in the darn line and then feel perhaps, I hope my fellow Christian is able to get her business worked out like I am trying to do. Now I do understand that you couldn't allow everyone to come in front of you, but remember this was one person. There are a lot of folks at a lot of these ATL churches that walk in to church on Sunday smiling and hugging and when the service is over, they have not learned one thing about humility, sincerity, humbleness and real love. It seems it is a big show with folks playing their parts. I'm talking about phoney fronters. Wonder if they would recognize themselves? Ummm, probably not. I know that everyone is not like that, but I know for a fact that I have experienced that and observed it in some of the churches. OK I know that we are supposed to act a certain way, but who is perfect? No, not one. Only Jesus Christ was perfect and without blemish. But as Paul says in Romans, the more he knows he should be doing what is right and good, the more he does the wrong thing. He was to me one of the greatest men of the Bible and he struggled so in closing let me say, that all of us have a little sumthing, sumthing to work on including myself so pray for me and I'll pray for you.

Helen said...

Jesus would have gotten at the end of the line. While I appreciate and understand your feelings and situation, breaking line is not the right thing to do. I don't think this is a question of Jesus in your church friend; it is a question of Jesus in YOU.

Who is to say that everyone else in line before you arrived was not experiencing some terrible hardship, that may have been worse than your situation? What about wronging them? As a person who abhors people breaking line, I identify with your church friend. I feel confident that she did not let you break because of the injustice of it, and not because she was just being mean to you.

This smacks of selective morality to me. Can you honestly say that had you been standing in line for hours and the person in front of you let someone break line it wouldn't have bothered you? And once they started talking about church and you realized they were Christians, what would you have thought then about "church folk"?

Very provocative topic.