80/20 Rule

Tyler Perry’s movie, Why did I get married? brings up an interesting concept. Basically, the theory is that we need to find someone with 80% of the qualities we like and not think that a person who is only bringing 20% is the answer.

I absolutely love this theory because for at least 5 years, I’ve been trying to decide on what are my deal breakers in a relationship. But now I like this approach of applying the 80/20 rule. If I have a list of 10 things and I find someone who is 80% of those things most of the time then I have found myself a WINNER. So now, you might be wondering what’s on my top 10 list. After much thought and consideration, I have finally settled on the following 10 things (please note: this list is subject to change without notice.):

Disclaimer: This list is not necessarily in order of importance.

1. Constantly improving
2. Generous
3. Funny
4. Financially Stable
5. Has an active relationship with God
6. Loves kids (and preferably has some of his own, like maybe 3:)
7. Likes to travel
8. Physically Attractive
9. Romantic
10. Likes doing “manly” stuff (ex. Washing a car, cutting grass, etc.)

So, now that I’m armed with my list I feel like I can actually assess whether someone is what I’m looking for and not get distracted by physical attributes since that’s only 10 % of my list. What’s on your top 10 list?

My Life Pie

Since the most romantic holiday is found in February, I've decided to spend this month focusing on love and relationships.



Recently, I met an amazing man who is constantly on my mind. So much so that it takes a deliberate effort to not write blog post solely about him and how he makes me feel. He and I have debated about this topic because he feels like love and relationship posts are more interesting. My argument is that while I am sooooo enjoying this season with him, he is not my entire existence. I still have myself , my children, my friends, my church, work and a whole host of other things that bring me enjoyment. I am hesitant to have my post focus primarily on my relationship with him because in the big picture it should not consume me. It should really only constitute a slice of my Life Pie, not be the entire pie. What do you think, how much of your Life Pie do you devote to romantic relationships?

It's so distracting to meet a new man...

I really have found that I absolutely HATE to meet someone new because I tell ya, I get so distracted. I can’t concentrate. Instead, I find myself daydreaming about the possibilities and replaying our most recent conversations. Or now in the age of technology, I am rereading emails and text messages. It’s totally ridiculous!!!! I swear I don’t get anything done because I’m so distracted by the possibilities. Ladies, you know what I’m talking about…Is this my Neo(like from The Matrix)?,Does he like to travel? How will our next date go or shall I say first date since at this point, I’ve only seen him once (and that was when we met.) I really am embarrassed that I’m so easily distracted from the more pressing issues in my life…like how to be debt-free, or what’s for dinner? Anywho…while I do really hate that I’m so distracted, I do LOVE the fact that I have someone to daydream about who is hopefully daydreaming about me too. So what's distracting you from being more productive these days?